The Moustache Brothers

After Inle Lake, the next stop on our itinerary was Mandalay. We had planned two nights in Mandalay, which is roughly 3 days since we'd be leaving on another overnight bus...unfortunately Brian spent all of day 2 in bed trying to sleep of the first illness of the trip (an apparently successful remedy, as he was up and moving again the next day). As a result, I ended up exploring most of the sights we had planned to see in Mandalay on my own, which basically consisted of me renting a bike and heading to see a beautiful teak monastery and a very golden Buddha, while making trips back to the guesthouse every couple hours to make sure Brian wasn’t getting any worse and making 'take away' soup runs (which means your soup comes in a plastic bag).  Neither one of us were overly impressed by Mandalay, it felt like just another big city with less character than Yangon. I would say that I could've totally skipped Mandalay if it weren't for the Moustache Brothers' performance I went to see.  Brian was very disappointed that he was sick and had to miss the show.

The Moustache Brothers are a comedy/vaudeville (Burmese style) team that, in a country where no one speaks out about the government because of fear of the consequences, will call the junta out for exactly what they are - a good ole' boys club that's living the good life at the expense of the citizens of Myanmar. They've paid for their openness - Par Par Lay ("Moustache Brother Number One!") has been arrested 3 times since 1996 (and as recently as 2007), and 2 of the 3 brothers served 6 year sentences after cracking jokes about the government in Aung San Suu Kyi's home.  They used to tour the country, but now they are restricted to nightly performances in their home, and only in English. Supposedly their 84 year old mother stands guard in case the "KGB" comes (“she gives the signal, we run, and they arrest the tourists instead!”).  The performance took place in a single-car garage sized room; they had a platform set up in the middle and about 25 people were seated around 2 sides of it.  They had a microphone in the room, and a old-school boombox (tape-player only) for music. When I came in, I was greeted by Lu Maw ("Mustache Brother Number 2!"), who appears to have the best English and thereby runs the show. When I was asked where I was from and said the USA, his response was "Ah...USA....Obama. Obama black skin, I black skin...I like Obama." (It sounds funny with a heavy Myanmar accent). The show was great - in between jabs at the government and jokes about how everything in his house is from China and costs $3, the whole family (the brothers, wives, and sister) performed traditional dances from around the country and demonstrated different kinds of dress (styles of longyi wear, hat wear, etc). I didn't think to bring my camera, and I totally regret it - they encourage photography, and asked that everyone post pictures on their blogs and on Facebook, because the more attention they get outside of Myanmar, the less likely the government is to shut them down and arrest them again. The first arrest of 2 of the 3 brothers in 1996 was alluded to briefly in the movie "About a Boy" starring Hugh Grant, and Lu Maw said publicity from that minor Hollywood sound bite is probably why his brothers only served 6 years and the punishment was not worse. Although I have no pictures, I give big props to the Moustache Brothers on our blog so they can continue spreading the word about what’s really going on in Myanmar. At the end of the day, jokes are jokes, but I'd venture to say, based on some of our own observations, these aren't far from the truth.

Here are a couple jokes I can remember:

 "My teeth hurt so bad, and I know I need to go to the dentist, so I go to Thailand and find a dentist there. The dentist finds out I'm from Burma, and asks why I come all the way to Thailand, are there no dentists in Burma? I say there are, but in Burma I can't open my mouth."

"Please, tourists, I beg you, do not steal while you are here, or try to cheat the people of Burma. The government doesn't like competition." 

Sadly, neither one of these jokes seem like they'd be out of place on Letterman or Leno...but in Myanmar it's enough to get you in jail.

The World's Longest Teak Bridge (1.2km) - Amarapura (near Mandalay)